10 Conversation Starters to Help Kids Talk About Their Day
10 Conversation starters with Children
So, it’s officially back in school season all around the area. Can’t believe it is that time already. I know a lot of kids who are starting in new schools, new grades and in new school districts. Most of them were excited to get back in to the swing of things. Now we just need to get those conversation starters going so they can tell us about it!
I know a lot of parents who are very excited to get back into the school routine as well.
A lot of families need that structure and scheduling to feel like they can make it to all of the life events.
But, with all this structure and daily events, kids seem to lack in conversation skills with parents.
Sometimes, we have to push them a little to get them to open up. You can use these conversation starters for kids to help you get on the right track.
Talking to some friends of mine who have older children than I do, I hear a lot of them say they can’t get their kids to talk about their school day.
The kids get home, do homework and then play on electronics or are off to sports practice.
Dinner is quiet or on the run to the practices. Nobody can really get the kids to say anything more than “It was a good day”, when asked “How was your school day today?”.
I know this can be the case with my little sister. If I ask her how her school day was, she usually just says “Good” and then continues on whatever she was doing.
If this is your case, I’ve got a list of 10 conversation starters to help your kids open up about their day.
Conversation Starters to Use with Children
- What was your favorite part of today at school?
- Who did you hang out with at school today? What makes them a good person?
- How did you help someone at school today? (If they didn’t – ask them how they can help someone tomorrow)
- Who did you sit with at lunch today?
- Who did you ride the bus home with today?
- If you could play anything at recess, what would you play?
- What’re you learning about in (their favorite class)?
- Did you make any mistakes today?
- What’re you excited to learn about in (favorite class)?
- What was your least favorite part of school today and why?
Bonus Conversation Instigating Question :
- Is there anything you’d like to tell me about your day?
As I started thinking about writing this post, I decided I would try some of these ideas out on my siblings, the next time I had dinner at my parents house.
So, one night, I was at my parents house for dinner. Both of my younger siblings (7 and 11 yrs old at the time of writing this post) had their iPads out.
They were watching different things on the iPad and I had had enough of the iPads and no conversation.
So, I struck one up and was pleasantly surprised at how it went. My younger sister is even the one who came up with the bonus question listed above. After she was done answering a couple of the questions I had asked her.
She ate some of her dinner and then looked at me and said, “Victoria, is there anything you’d like to tell me about your day?”.
I was really proud of her for reciprocating the conversation without having to be nudged. She did it all on her own and was genuinely interested. She ate some more of her dinner and later on said, “Victoria, can I tell you something else about my day?”.
So, I know these conversation starters seem basic or silly, but, they work. During any other dinner conversation, she’s glued to the iPad or acting crazy and getting in trouble.
I’m sure you’ll have to change-up the questions and not use the same ones repetitively, as this will end up like the boring “How was your day?” conversations.
I asked my brother, who home schools, what he did today for school. His response was “Math”. Not gonna cut it buddy! So, I said, “Ok, Kev, you did math today, but, what did you learn in math?”.
He told me about absolute numbers and integers, etc. So, it’s sparked a little more of a conversation than I normally get out of him. It was nice to hear him talk and be peeled away from the iPad or phone for a bit.
Like I said before, these conversation starters may seem a little excessive or silly, but, you’d be amazed at how many families just ask “Sally, how was your day?”. She says “good” and then Sally goes back to her electronics and the parents return to whatever they were doing.
Instead of just asking the normal “How was your day?”- try asking your kids any of the above ten ideas and see if this can help spark a conversation. It can totally change your conversation times.
I hope these help open up some stories between you and your kids. A lot of the times, the kids just want to shut down and not talk about their day. Sometimes, when they’re younger, they don’t know HOW to open up.
What conversation starters do you use to help the spark with your kids? Share them in the comments below!
I love this! For the first several weeks of school my son didn’t want to say ANYTHING about school. He always said he’d tell me later, haha!
Lol and I bet later never came! So frustrating. Thanks for sharing your story and stopping by to read!
Love this! My daughter is so good for the “I didn’t do anything” answer and it drives me bizerk! I will definitely be implementing some of these strategies!
Hopefully these help!!! I couldn’t stand when I asked the kids how their day was and it was always… good or boring…. I need real answers here kiddos!
Great questions to ask! I’m not a parent, but I have friends who could definitely use these. It’s so important to find out what happened at school and how they are feeling about things. 🙂
Absolutely. The more we communicate with the kids, the more they open up about everything. This can help fix problems before they become bigger too.
I like that you tried them out. It helps to show that they do make a difference in the conversation. As a kid I was glued to books and never really talked. Just who I am, but now I read on the kindle app, so it looks like I am glued to ipad haha. Nope, just reading!
At least you’re doing something constructive. Most kids just wanna play games or watch a show.
These are great ideas! Thanks for sharing you perspective. I also wrote a list like this not too long ago, but now I have a little more to add 🙂
That’s awesome! I’m hoping that the more I use these with my siblings and other friends children, I can add more to the list too!!!
I’m so glad that you have more to add to your list! That means that they’re talking 😉
These are great! When we were younger, my mom came up with the rule that we all had to share 3 things about our day and at least 2 of them had to be positive. It really made us think about our days (especially during the moody teen years!).
That’s perfect!!!! LOVEEEEEEE THIS IDEA. Way to go to your mama!
These are great. My 3 year old had his first day of preschool yesterday and when I asked how it went he said “school is fun. Listening is really hard.” ?
awww that’s too adorable! Listening is hard hehehehe.
These are great ideas and suggestions! I have now tried a few of these with my younger son, as he was playing on his tablet. I got a few quick answers. Will be now experimenting with these more 🙂 He is usually pretty talkative unless he is busy with his gadgets…
Thanks. I know the gadgets really make it hard for some kids. I hope these get your son to open up a bit more even if the tablet is around.
Awesome tips, thanks for sharing. But I´m not sure if I ask my kid about his mistakes :O
Some kids own up to it, some don’t. I know with my sister, sometimes, I’ll give an example of a mistake she made and then without even realizing she will say oh, yeah, today I did such and such. Sometimes, she won’t say anything too. But, at least, if I can get her thinking and answering sometimes is better than not at all.
These are great! My daughter always says “I don’t remember” when I ask her what she learned at school immediately after she gets off the bus! Another question I have found effective is, “Did you make any new friends” or “What is the name of someone you met in class”, this usually sparks something they remember about what they did with this person. Either way, you can’t let those kids just sit on their electronics all night!
Totally agreed Brittany! Those are some great questions to ask too!!!!
These are great specific suggestions to get people talking. Asking good questions is such an important conversational skill, whether we’re talking to children and adults. Specific questions can really draw people out and show them that we’re genuinely interested in what they have to say. Your young siblings are lucky to have you!
That’s so sweet. I can’t imagine life without them. Our family is definitely different as far as age ranges between kids go. But, it makes for a fun family dynamic when I’m at my parents house. Their is 16 years between my brother and I. 21 years between my sister and I and now I have a daughter. So, many age ranges for sure.
These are great! Thanks for sharing.
I have a 7 year old that is not a talker like his older 9 year old brother, I will definitely try some of these out during our dinner conversations. Great list!
Such good tips. Opened ended questions are so helpful but without a little direction the kids might feel a little too overwhelmed to talk about it
Great ideas! I always want to know more about my kiddos day but don’t know where to start! I have to try some of these!
I totally needed this! We have our first school aged little one this year! And it has been such a big change for us. Getting him to talk about it can be a bit like pulling teeth. Thanks for this perfect list!
Such good ideas! I need to try using some of these this week!